Mom’s Meal
“Because One Serving Of Peas Just Isn’t Enough”

THE INTRO

Ok, so this week’s title isn’t quite as catchy as the regular. However, after my own frigging mother not only outpicked me this week but in fact tripled my win total (well, tripled +1, to be completely precise), it might as well be her column, not mine.

Sure. “Everyone has a bad week”. But does EVERYONE write a column and send it out to some 200+ people so that they can publicly embarass themselves in the process? Does everyone not only have a bad week, but have an absolutely ridiculous joke of a week to completely ruin his or her season averages?

Okay, calm down Dave. There is too much to be happy about. Hockey is BACK. Playoff baseball is in full swing. You are STILL, even after this awful week, ahead of last year’s totals. Lets just sit back, relax, and pick some winners.

I honestly don’t think I could do worse if I tried.

CHANGES/UPDATES TO THE DIME

– The RECAP section has been reduced to simply the game scores, and whether I won or lost. The commentary on these games often is just a repeat of what you’ve already read the week before (if you read, that is), and so theres no sense in keeping it.

THE RECORD

Last Week
With the spread: 3 – 10 – 1 (.231)
Without the spread: 6 – 8 – 0 (.429)
$$Money Picks$$: 0 – 4 – 0 (.000)
^^Zen Picks^^: 1 – 4 – 0 (.200)
**Outright Upsets**: 1 – 5 – 0 (.167)

Season
With the spread: 30 – 28 – 2 (.517)
Without the spread: 40 – 20 – 0 (.666)
$$Money Picks$$: 5 – 7 – 0 (.417)
^^Zen Picks^^: 5 – 5 – 1 (.500)
**Outright Upsets**: 9 – 7 – 0 (.563)

LAST WEEK’S RECAP OF DAVE’S BRILLIANCE AND FOOLISHNESS
(Often Foolishness)

Arizona 10 1 – 2 (+7.5) @ Atlanta 32 2 – 1 (-7.5)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: WIN Atlanta
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN Atlanta

Dallas 45 1 – 1 (-10.0) @ Tennessee 14 0 – 3 (+10.0)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS *^Tennessee
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN Dallas

Indianapolis 31 3 – 0 (-9.0) @ N.Y. Jets 28 2 – 1 (+9.0)
ICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS Indianapolis
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN Indianapolis

Miami 15 1 – 2 (-3.5) @ Houston 17 0 – 3 (+3.5)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: WIN *^Houston
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN *Houston

Minnesota 12 2 – 1 (+1.0) @ Buffalo 17 1 – 2 (-1.0)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS *$Minnesota
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS *Minnesota

New Orleans 18 3 – 0 (+7.0) @ Carolina 21 1 – 2 (-7.0)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: WIN *New Orleans
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN Carolina

San Diego 13 2 – 0 (-2.0) @ Baltimore 16 3 – 0 (+2.0)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS $San Diego
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS San Diego

San Francisco 0 1 – 2 (+7.0) @ Kansas City 41 0 – 2 (-7.0)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS *San Francisco
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS *San Francisco

Detroit 34 0 – 3 (+6.0) @ St. Louis 41 2 – 1 (-6.0)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS *^Detroit
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS *Detroit

Cleveland 24 0 – 3 (-3.0) @ Oakland 21 0 – 2 (+3.0)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: TIE *^Oakland
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS *Oakland

Jacksonville 30 2 – 1 (-3.0) @ Washington 36 1 – 2 (+3.0)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS $Jacksonville
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS Jacksonville

New England 38 2 – 1 (+6.0) @ Cincinnati 13 3 – 0 (-6.0)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS $Cincinnati
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS Cincinnati

Seattle 6 3 – 0 (+3.5) @ Chicago 37 3 – 0 (-3.5)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS *^Seattle
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS *Seattle

Green Bay 9 1 – 2 (+11.0) @ Philadelphia 31 2 – 1 (-11.0)
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS *Green Bay
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN Philidelphia

DAMN, I’M GOOD

When you go 3 – 10 – 1, you can’t give yourself credit for one of the 3 wins. Seriously.

THE PICKS

* – Indicates Upset Pick
$ – Indicates Money Pick
^ – Indicates Zen Pick

SUNDAY

Buffalo 2 – 2 (+10.0) @ Chicago 4 – 0 (-10.0)
Heres the thing. In my head, I’ve got this game playing out to be a tough, defensive struggle, so 10 points seems like an awful lot. Then I remember that the Bears dont give up any points… to anyone. 29 points in 4 games so far. That’s just silly. Until they look human, I’ll pick them, even if I do have to give up two scores in the process.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: Chicago
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Chicago

Cleveland 1 – 3 (+8.0) @ Carolina 2 – 2 (-8.0)
Carolina is definitely the better team, but one thing you have to admire about this Browns team is its resiliancy. Not that coming back from 18 points against the Raiders is THAT big of a deal, but just the idea that the team will give you 60 minutes makes them an okay pick with 8 points.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: *Cleveland
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Carolina

Detroit 0 – 4 (+6.5) @ Minnesota 2 – 2 (-6.5)
Here’s a really tough one. My gut tells me to go with Detroit to cover, but I’ll go against it (even though I hate doing so) and pick the comfortable Viking victory. After all, both of the Vikings losses came to tough defensive teams, and Detroit certainly isn’t that.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: Minnesota
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Minnesota

Miami 1 – 3 (+10.0) @ New England 3 – 1 (-10.0)
Hahahahahahahahaha… haha… seriously… hahaha… The Dolphins are so, so, so bad. The Patriots win all the time. Look for an absolute blowout here.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: $New England
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: New England

St. Louis 3 – 1 (-3.0) @ Green Bay 1 – 3 (+3.0)
Even if I do hate them, the Rams are capible of winning games. And the Packers are certainly a team that they should beat. Now that I’m picking them, though, they’ll probably drop.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: St. Louis
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: St. Louis

Tampa Bay 0 – 3 (+6.5) @ New Orleans 3 – 1 (-6.5)
Something tells me that Tampa will find its grove in this game… but I can’t pick against the Saints, who have not only looked awesome, but have the home field advantage which is now actually a very big deal for them.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: New Orleans
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: New Orleans

Tennessee 0 – 4 (+18.5) @ Indianapolis 4 – 0 (-18.5)
Hmm. Well, the Zen book says take the whopping underdog. Unfortunately, I simply can not do that. No matter how many times I play the game out in my head, its never within 21 points for the Titans. The Colts will crush them, and I have to regrettably give up a ton of points. So be it.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: Indianapolis
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Indianapolis

Washington 2 – 2 (+5.0) @ N.Y. Giants 1 – 2 (-5.0)
Last week Washington impressed me immensely with their in over Jacksonville. And while the Giants aren’t a bad team, I’m going to take the Redskins outright in this one.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: *Washington
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: *Washington

Kansas City 1 – 2 (-3.5) @ Arizona 1 – 3 (+3.5)
While I love Leinart, I do think that the Chiefs will be able to take care of the Cardinals. Huard has filled in very nicely for Trent Green, and they should be able to win this one. The Cards on paper are still scary, but they just haven’t shown it yet on the field.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: Kansas City
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Kansas City

N.Y. Jets 2 – 2 (+7.0) @ Jacksonville 2 – 2 (-7.0)
Two teams I love, and a ridiculous spread in my opinion. The Jets played an amazing game against the Colts last week, and have been impressive overall on the season. As much as I love the Jags, I see them winning this game by 3 or 4, not 7. In fact, I don’t even know who is going to win this game. A Jet’s “upset” wouldn’t surprise me, but I guess I’ll take the Jags at home.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: *$N.Y. Jets
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Jacksonville

Oakland 0 – 3 (+3.5) @ San Francisco 1 – 3 (-3.5)
A game and rivalry that used to carry with it prestige is now simply a game that is a waste of everyone’s time. And, while I’d like to pick the Raiders, I really don’t think they will win this game. I’ll take them with the FG out of pity, but SF gets the win.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: *Oakland
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: San Fransisco

Dallas 2 – 1 (+1.5) @ Philadelphia 3 – 1 (-1.5)
Lets see. We know that TO hates the Eagles. We know that the Eagles hate TO. TO is one man, and a reciever at that – he can only do as much as the QB lets him. The Eagles, on the other hand, are an entire team. And McNabb, Owens’ rival, gets to touch the ball every single play. Stats be damned, the Eagles slaughter in this one.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: $^Philidelphia
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Philidelphia

Pittsburgh 1 – 2 (+3.0) @ San Diego 2 – 1 (-3.0)
The Chargers showed that they can be beat by a good defensive team last week, and while I still do respect them, I think they are going to lose this game, too. Look for the Pittsburgh D to force Rivers to make a few bad decisions, and steal this game in SD.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: *Pittsburgh
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: *Pittsburgh

MONDAY

Baltimore 4 – 0 (+4.0) @ Denver 2 – 1 (-4.0)
With a solid pass rush, I think Baltimore can get to and beat Plummer. Besides that, they are just one of those teams that refuses to lose. As long as they are undefeated AND I don’t have to give up any points (and in this case, I GET points), I’ll take them.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: *Baltimore
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: *Baltimore

PICKS CHALLENGE

Think you’ve got what it takes to out pick me? Now is your chance to show it!

Standings
Dave: 1 – 1 – 1
Readers: 1 – 1 – 1

Last Week
Players: 10

Of course the public beat me this week… all but one of you beat me. Needless to say, it adds up.

Brian, who came in dead last a week ago, bounced back big time, leading the pack with an 8 – 5 – 1 record.

Mom(?!?) and Brandon were the only others to finish above .500 with 7 – 6 – 1 marks.

J Rob and Park came in at 6 – 7 – 1; The Mojo, Dad, and Ross came in at 5 – 8 – 1, and Cash Money went 4 – 9 – 1.

None of you did as bad as the lovely Tarkoff though, who finished 3 – 10 – 1. Only I did that badly.

We’re all tied up! Who will take the lead this week? The public, or me? Send in your picks!

Rules
The rules are very simple. You email me (or facebook message me, for my facebook readers) your picks WITH THE SPREAD (use the spreads I’ve listed below) every week. You can research them, flip a coin, do whatever you like.

In said email, also give me a nickname you’d like to go by… or, just your first name, if your creative juices aren’t flowing.

I will also keep track of all of your year to date totals. The top few people with the best winning percentage will get some kind of prize (by prize I mean something free and worthless, but bragging rights are good for something aren’t they?). YOU DON’T HAVE TO PLAY EVERY WEEK! I’d like you to, but if you miss a week or didn’t play last week, it’s okay to start now!

This section will only work if alot of you participate… it’s just for fun! Don’t be afraid! Send in your picks! Having a section dedicated to two readers wouldn’t make any sense. 10, 20, 30 of you, all of a sudden we have ourselves a fun little thing going here.

So can you beat the Dime? Give it a try!

Buffalo 2 – 2 (+10.0) @ Chicago 4 – 0 (-10.0)
Cleveland 1 – 3 (+8.0) @ Carolina 2 – 2 (-8.0)
Detroit 0 – 4 (+6.5) @ Minnesota 2 – 2 (-6.5)
Miami 1 – 3 (+10.0) @ New England 3 – 1 (-10.0)
St. Louis 3 – 1 (-3.0) @ Green Bay 1 – 3 (+3.0)
Tampa Bay 0 – 3 (+6.5) @ New Orleans 3 – 1 (-6.5)
Tennessee 0 – 4 (+18.5) @ Indianapolis 4 – 0 (-18.5)
Washington 2 – 2 (+5.0) @ N.Y. Giants 1 – 2 (-5.0)
Kansas City 1 – 2 (-3.5) @ Arizona 1 – 3 (+3.5)
N.Y. Jets 2 – 2 (+7.0) @ Jacksonville 2 – 2 (-7.0)
Oakland 0 – 3 (+3.5) @ San Francisco 1 – 3 (-3.5)
Dallas 2 – 1 (+1.5) @ Philadelphia 3 – 1 (-1.5)
Pittsburgh 1 – 2 (+3.0) @ San Diego 2 – 1 (-3.0)
Baltimore 4 – 0 (+4.0) @ Denver 2 – 1 (-4.0)

THE COLLEGE NICKEL

RECORD: 8 – 5 – 2 (.615)

1. Arkansas Razorbacks (+15.0) @ Auburn Tigers (-15.0)
Arkansas is playing some good football, and whil Auburn is certainly the better team, I don’t think they will be blowing Arkansas out this week. Two TDs is more than enough to make this a worthwhile bet.

2. Bowling Green Falcons (+36.0) @ Ohio State Buckeyes (-36.0)
Bowling Green isn’t even in league with the Buckeyes, but this is the biggest game of the year for them. As for Ohio State, this is an easy throw away game after a difficult schedule to this point. Look for Bowling Green to keep it close for a quarter or so, and to win with their 5 TDs.

3. Stanford Cardinal (+30.0) @ Notre Dame Fighting Irish (-30.0)
Stanford is downright awful, and Notre Dame and Brady Quinn need a huge game. This should be it, at home.

4. Arizona Wildcats (+11.5) @ UCLA Bruins (-11.5)
Arizona could very well win this game outright. This certainly shouldn’t be a high scoring affair, and 11.5 is plenty of points. I’d probably take Arizona at +8.0, so the extra field goal is more than welcome.

5. Washington State Cougars (-3.0) @ Oregon State Beavers (+3.0)
Washington State comes a converted hail mary away from beating USC, and then is only a fieldgoal favorite to the lowly Beavers a week later? Home field advantage be damned, Bumpus and the Cougars cover in this one.

HONORABLE MENTION (4 – 5 – 0):
Oregon Ducks (+5.0) @ Cal Golden Bears (-5.0)

Questions? Comments? Love the Dime? Hate it? Should I cut it down to a nickel? SEND ME FEEDBACK!

MY TEAM’S RECORDS
OAKLAND RAIDERS: 0 – 3 – 0
USC TROJANS: 4 – 0 – 0
LOS ANGELES KINGS: 0 – 1 – 0 – 0

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