Dave’s Dime
“Because Two Cents Just Isn’t Enough”

THE INTRO

It’s official. My picks are a joke.

Scene: Two guys are walking down the street.

Guy 1: “Hey, have you read this column Dave’s Dime? It’s a riot.”
Guy 2: “Oh, I know, its hilarious. The guy actually thinks he knows sports, breaks down and analyzes each game, and then makes a complete fool of himself to his 9 readers!”

*Both men laugh heartily and then go their seperate ways.

END SCENE

Okay, okay. Don’t go feeling too badly for me. I got a wave of support from many of my loyal readers last week, letting me know that they still believe in me, etc. And I appreciate it. And seriously, I’ve got to snap out of this cold streak eventually. In fact, this week’s FIVE wins is indeed, sadly, a sign of IMPROVEMENT.

This time I’ll quote my buddy Jonathan, who chuckled when hockey season started, and said something along the lines of “DAVE… you’re gonna start sucking at football. Or you’ll suck at hockey. We both know you can’t do well in both Dave. It’s you.” – You bastard. I blame you for this!

UPDATES/CHANGES TO THE DIME

Regrettably, I’ve decided to do away with the “Picks Challenge” section. While it was definitely fun and a cool idea, it proves to be way too much effort if only 10 people are playing every week… plus it distracts a bit from what I need to be doing, and thats focusing on picking winners.

I have an idea for a new interactive section though that I think can be a lot of fun. It’s called “You Said It”. Read about it at the bottom of the column.

Lastly, under the “Last Week’s Recap” section, I have gone from writing a ton to writing nothing at all. I’ve found a healthy medium. One liners.

THE RECORD

Last Week
With the spread: 5 – 8 – 0 (.384)
Without the spread: 8 – 5 – 0 (.615)
$$Money Picks$$: 2 – 3 – 0 (.400)
^^Zen Picks^^: 2 – 1 – 0 (.666)
**Outright Upsets**: 2 – 1 – 0 (.666)

Season
With the spread: 38 – 44 – 5 (.463)
Without the spread: 59 – 28 – 0 (.678)
$$Money Picks$$: 7 – 10 – 1 (.412)
^^Zen Picks^^: 7 – 6 – 1 (.538)
**Outright Upsets**: 11 – 11 – 0 (.500)

LAST WEEK’S RECAP OF DAVE’S BRILLIANCE AND FOOLISHNESS
(Often Foolishness)

Cincinnati 13 3 – 1 (-4.5) @ Tampa Bay 14 0 – 4 (+4.5)
Credit Tampa for the last minute comeback… but this game should not have come down to the last minute.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS $Cincinnati
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS Cincinnati

Tennessee 25 0 – 5 (+10.5) @ Washington 22 2 – 3 (+10.5)
Forget a letdown, Tennessee came out AMPED for this one.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS ^Washington
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS Washington

Houston 6 1 – 3 (+13.0) @ Dallas 34 2 – 2 (-13.0)
No surprises here.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: WIN Dallas
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN Dallas

Carolina 23 3 – 2 (+3.0) @ Baltimore 21 4 – 1 (-3.0)
Picks like this make me proud I at least get a few right still.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: WIN *Carolina
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN *Carolina

N.Y. Giants 27 2 – 2 (+3.0) @ Atlanta 14 3 – 1 (-3.0)
I can’t figure this Giants team out… but then, what can I figure out these days?
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS Atlanta
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS Atlanta

Seattle 30 3 – 1 (-3.0) @ St. Louis 28 4 – 1 (+3.0)
54 yard fieldgoal to win it? Talk about stealing a game. Then again, Morris shouldn’t have fumbled on the 10, and I should have covered.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS Seattle
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN Seattle

Philadelphia 24 4 – 1 (-3.0) @ New Orleans 27 4 – 1 (+3.0)
Make no mistake about it; New Orleans is officially NOT a fluke.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS Philadelphia
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS Philadelphia

San Diego 48 3 – 1 (-9.5) @ San Francisco 19 2 – 3 (+9.5)
Sometimes, the team that is SUPPOSED to beat the other team does. Cool, huh?
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: WIN $San Diego
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN San Diego

Kansas City 7 2 – 2 (+7.0) @ Pittsburgh 45 1 – 3 (-7.0)
Ouch, there is wrong, and then there is 38 points wrong.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS *Kansas City
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS *Kansas City

Miami 17 1 – 4 (+2.5) @ N.Y. Jets 20 2 – 3 (-2.5)
Miami sucks. Bad. They were supposed to do well this year, too.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: WIN $^N.Y. Jets
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN N.Y. Jets

Oakland 3 0 – 4 (+14.0) @ Denver 13 3 – 1 (-14.0)
Oakland didn’t COVER… Denver didn’t TRY is more accurate.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS $$Denver
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: WIN Denver

Chicago 24 5 – 0 (-11.0) @ Arizona 23 1 – 4 (+11.0)
What’s to be said that hasn’t already been said a million times on this one? If you don’t know the story, go look it up.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: LOSS $Chicago
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: LOSS Chicago

DAMN, I’M GOOD

Buffalo 2 – 3 (-1.5) @ Detroit 0 – 5 (+1.5)
This is a strictly Zen pick. This is the type of pick that you say to yourself, why isn’t Buffalo favored by 6 points? Why did the line actually open up at Detroit -1.0? EVERYONE is betting Buffalo, and is the public ever right? The answers to questions 1 and 2 are “probably because Vegas knows something we dont” and the answer to number 3 is an emphatic NO. So screw public (and my) perception, I’ll take the Lions.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: ^*Detroit
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: *Detroit
– Ah, the magic of Zen.

THE PICKS

* – Indicates Upset Pick
$ – Indicates Money Pick
^ – Indicates Zen Pick

SUNDAY

Carolina 4 – 2 (+3.0) @ Cincinnati 3 – 2 (-3.0)
Carolina is working on all cylinders with 4 straight wins, and Cinci is doing the opposite with two straight losses. I’d like to take the Bengals at home as I do think they are going to right the ship soon; but any time you are going to give me points to take the hot team, I’ll do it.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: *Carolina
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: *Carolina

Detroit 1 – 5 (+3.5) @ N.Y. Jets 3 – 3 (-3.5)
This game is giving me a lot of trouble for reasons I can’t quite place my finger on. Since its essentially a toss-up, I’ll take the team I like more and that also happens to be at home, the J-E-T-S Jets Jets Jets.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: N.Y. Jets
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: N.Y. Jets

Green Bay 1 – 4 (+5.5) @ Miami 1 – 5 (-5.5)
5.5? Really? Why? Miami sucks. Yes, I’m aware that GB also sucks, but that’s exactly why this should not be 5.5 points. Maybe because its in Miami? Whatever the case may be, not only am I taking the points, I’m taking the “upset” too.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: *Green Bay
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: *Green Bay

Jacksonville 3 – 2 (-9.5) @ Houston 1 – 4 (+9.5)
Can’t tell you why, but I promised myself I would go with my gut this week, and my gut tells me that Jacksonville only wins this game by a TD, so I’ll take the points, as irrational as it is.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: *Houston
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Jacksonville

New England 4 – 1 (-5.5) @ Buffalo 2 – 4 (+5.5)
Buffalo is not nearly as good as they looked at the beginning of the season, and I’m not concerned about them beating the Patriots. Because they Pats hate me, they’ll probably win by 4… but I’ll take my chances money picking even -5.5.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: $New England
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: New England

Philadelphia 4 – 2 (-5.5) @ Tampa Bay 1 – 4 (+5.5)
After last weeks loss to the Saints, this is a game that the Eagles need to win to keep their position at the top of their division. I figure they’ll do so in convincing fashion, even if a voice in the back of my head whispers not to underestimate the Bucs.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: Philadelphia
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Philadelphia

Pittsburgh 2 – 3 (-2.5) @ Atlanta 3 – 2 (+2.5)
Pittsburgh will use the exact same recipe the Giants did last week and take care of Vick and the Falcons on their home turf.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: Pittsburgh
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Pittsburgh

San Diego 4 – 1 (-5.0) @ Kansas City 2 – 3 (+5.0)
The book of Zen was written for this game. Zen Rule 1) One team is coming off a huge blowout (KC) while the other did the blowing out (SD), and you should bet the team that was blown out. Rule 2) Public. Everyone and their mother has San Diego as an easy pick. Rule 3) Line… why is it only 5? Its taunting us into betting the seemingly OBVIOUS San Diego. This game is so damn ZEN-FILLED that not only am I taking KC to cover, but I’ll take them outright.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: ^^*Kansas City
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: *Kansas City

Denver 4 – 1 (-4.5) @ Cleveland 1 – 4 (+4.5)
You simply can not score on Denver’s defense. It isn’t possible. How this game isn’t over 7 points baffles me. But not in a Zen way – in a simple I’ll take the easy win way.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: $Denver
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Denver

Arizona 1 – 5 (-3.0) @ Oakland 0 – 5 (+3.0)
I’ll take the Cardinals, but not because Leinart is starting. As a Raider fan, one thing is clear – big time running backs are simply unstoppable to us. And Edgerrin James is that type of back. Look for 150 or so yards from him, and yet another sad chapter written on this pitiful season for the Raiders.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: Arizona
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Arizona

Minnesota 3 – 2 (+6.5) @ Seattle 4 – 1 (-6.5)
Betting against Seattle at home is just flirting with disaster, but Minnesota has done a good job keeping games close this year, and I’ll go out on a limb and say they can do the same here with Alexander still supposedly out of action.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: *Minnesota
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Seattle

Washington 2 – 4 (+8.5) @ Indianapolis 5 – 0 (-8.5)
Despite the occassional flash of brilliance, Washington isn’t very good. Indy will take this one quite convincingly for their home crowd.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: $Indianapolis
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Indianapolis

MONDAY

N.Y. Giants 3 – 2 (+3.0) @ Dallas 3 – 2 (-3.0)
The Giants, as I stated above, make no sense to me. Regardless though, I’m going to give the edge to Dallas on offensive talents and homefield advantage.
PICK WITH THE SPREAD: Dallas
PICK WITHOUT THE SPREAD: Dallas

THE COLLEGE NICKEL

RECORD: 15 – 8 – 2 (.652)

1. Louisville Cardinals (-17.5) @ Syracuse Orangemen (+17.5)
I think Syracuse is awesome. Hell, I briefly considered going to school there. Had I done so, I would have gone to this game and watched my team get absolutely hammered by the Louisville Cardinals.

2. Washington Huskies (+23.5) @ Cal Golden Bears (-23.5)
While 23.5 seems like a lot of points, Cal really is among the elite in the nation. Washington without Stanback is lost without a cause. In Cal, the Bears absolutely maul the Huskies.

3. UCLA Bruins (+13.0) @ Notre Dame Fighting Irish (-13.0)
In a true testament to how little credit Notre Dame gets, they are only 13 point favorites against a lowly UCLA team. Newsflash, country: This one isn’t going to be close.

4. Iowa Hawkeyes (+13.0) @ Michigan Wolverines (-13.0)
While I respect the Hawkeyes, they aren’t quite in league with the Wolverines, and two touchdowns is a small price to pay in this one.

5. Indiana Hoosiers (+31.0) @ Ohio State Buckeyes (-31.0)
Not a flashy pick, but I don’t think Ohio State is going to be taking this game that seriously. They’ll probably win by 4 TDs and be content with that; and so will I at 31 points.

HONORABLE MENTION (6 – 8 – 0):

Tulane Green Wave (+31.5) @ Auburn Tigers (-31.5)

Stanford Cardinal (+23.0) @ Arizona State Sun Devils (-23.0)

Fresno State Bulldogs (+32.5) @ LSU Tigers (-32.5)

YOU SAID IT!

Pretty self explanatory. This section will be what you guys and girls make it. I’ve got alot of opinionated readers… and this section will give you a chance to let your voice be heard.

You can get quoted in this section any number of ways. Send me some cleverly written hate mail. Compliment me. Send me your picks of your favorite games of the week with commentary, so I can post them here when you are spot on or hilariously wrong.

I know of at least 5 of you (and you know who you are!) that could run with this and make it really awesome. Just email me with the title “You Said It” and just type any damn thing thats on your mind about me, football, or the universe in general. If it makes me laugh or think, it’ll probably do the same for my readers, and it’ll be here.

Don’t be shy. Write in with whatever you’ve got.

And, for those of you that still want to pick with the spread for fun each week, feel free. I’ll keep track of how you do for you, and let you know what your end of the year numbers are at… the end of the year.

Hopefully next week this section will be chock full of YOUR quotes!

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Questions? Comments? Love the Dime? Hate it? Should I cut it down to a nickel? SEND ME FEEDBACK!

MY TEAM’S RECORDS
OAKLAND RAIDERS: 0 – 5 – 0
USC TROJANS: 6 – 0 – 0
LOS ANGELES KINGS: 3 – 4 – 1

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